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10 Things I Want My Child To Learn By Age 10

October 7, 2014 / Family, Kids / 0 comment

My tiny girl is growing up so fast. She’s just three, and while some days she still seems like a baby, others she is already showing signs of the big kid she’s quickly becoming. Raising a girl is taking me back to my own childhood and bringing up memories—both good and bad—of how fun, wonderful and also difficult it can be navigating the move from child to tween. There are so many things I want to teach my daughter and show her as she grows into a young lady, ready to take on the world on her own. Here are ten things I hope she learns by the time she turns double digits.

To be a good friend
Right now I’m trying to teach the concept of sharing. She has no trouble attracting little friends at this stage, and I hope that as she gets older she will keep friends close to her heart. Friends will support her throughout life when family can’t be there, and fill in the place of the siblings she doesn’t have.

To stand up for herself
Growing up in Brooklyn playgrounds, this kid has no trouble standing up for herself if another kid tries to grab a toy out of her hands. But it’s a world of difference in the grade school and tween years, when kids can get mean and catty and form cliques. I hope that by helping our daughter realize her self worth, she will be able able to keep her confidence high and stand up to bullies.

To stand up for others
I also want my daughter to use her strength to help others in need, to speak up for people who can’t speak up for themselves. Sometimes we need to be a voice for those who aren’t able to use their own. A little empathy and kindness make the world a better place for everyone to live in.

To develop her own voice
It’s so easy to follow others and ignore what makes you special so you blend in. It takes a great deal of personal character and strength to really be yourself and follow your own heart. I hope my fearless girl will continue to stand confident in her own values and embrace being unique.

To be bold
When we’re little it’s easy to be brave. As we get older, though, fear starts to get in the way of us fulfilling our potential. I want my girl to keep her sassiness and fearlessness, and continue to be the brave girl who has forged her own way since birth.

To be her own style icon
There’s no need to copy other people’s styles and trends when you can create a unique look that’s perfect for just you. I hope to see many adventurous outfits and hairstyles on my daughter as she becomes a tween. Crazy hair? Sure, bring it on!

To be kind to animals
Animals need us to watch out for them—to champion their causes and to pick them up when they’re hurt. My daughter already loves animals. The next step is teaching her to show all creatures empathy and give them help when they need it—whether it’s bringing home a stray kitten or telling us she’s found a bird with a broken wing that needs aid.

To keep trying
We’ve all been there—sometimes it feels like it’s easier to just give up. Take riding a bike, for example. It may seem hard at first and not worth to trying (especially when you can just scoot or walk instead), but it is. What’s important, though, isn’t the bike riding (although having your own transportation is awesome), it’s the trying and persisting that builds character. I know this will ultimately help my daughter succeed later in life.

To dream big and work hard
We all start with big dreams. Huge, lofty, crazy dreams about the way we want our lives to go. But how often do we follow through on these dreams? They don’t magically come true—dreams require a lot of hard work and persistence. So keep on dreaming big, little one, and get ready to work your butt off to make them a reality.

To find the joy in each day
Some days are not joyful. They’re downright hard and sometimes sad. It’s not realistic to ask anyone to be happy every day of their lives, but I hope that my daughter is able to find at least a small moment of joy in every day, to help her keep loving life even through the tough times.

This article first appeared on MommyNearest.

Cheese Turns Three: Frozen Party Extravaganza

August 25, 2014 / Cheese, Family, friends, Kids / 6 Comments

For Cheese’s third birthday party, only Frozen would do. She loves the movie and songs, so I decided to throw her a Frozen at my parents’ house. They have a big property with lots of yard space, perfect for lots of little kiddies to enjoy running around. First step: acquiring an Elsa dress from the Disney store. This was actually a lot easier than I thought it would be. I dropped by the Disney store in Times Square one day after hearing rumors that they had them in stock, and they did actually have them. Easy! I bought the dress and Queen Elsa crown both from the Disney store and saved them for her party to avoid damage. Next step was stocking up on Frozen party supplies. I bought all of mine from Partycity.com, including the plates, cups, snowy background backdrop that doubled as Arendale for the photobooth, the cardboard Anna and Elsa and an Anna and Elsa balloon, and co-ordinated cutlery, wands, tables cloths and crafting activities for the kids. The goodie bags also came from Party City – reusable cups, stickers, bubbles and clear party bags to wrap them all up in. I ordered cookies to look like Anna, Elsa, snowflakes and Olafs to add into the bags as well as put on the dessert table, from Cookie Queen Kitsch’n, a local cookie baker in Sydney. I own zero party goods, so borrowed lots from friends, like the cake stands, water cooler, kids’ trestle tables, kids’ chairs and jumping castle. Thank you girls, I really appreciate your generosity! I was worried about having lots of kids with nothing to do, so I put together craft tables. One with crayons, Frozen-themed colouring in pages that I bought from Etsy, Frozen stickers from Partycity.com and the wands. The other table had craft packs from Partycity.com that were suitable for toddlers and up – an easy project involving sticking together a foam photo frame with snowflakes and snowmen. The frame was a hit with all the kids, even the oldest guest, who was eight. For the centerpiece table, I strung up pompoms and snowflakes from partycity.com, and created a fun table for both kids and adults to enjoy. Water bottles with “melted snowman” labels from Etsy, more of the cookies from Cookie Queen Kitsch’n, Sven reindeer and snowball cake pops (homemade), jelly cups with blueberries, raspberries and fondant snowflakes on top (homemade), Zumbo macarons with homemade fondant snowflakes on top, homemade cheese, vegemite and peanut butter sandwiches cut into stars, flowers and hearts, and popcorn in boxes (boxes bought on Partycity.com with stickers added to the side). The cake was made by Sydney-based Cakes by Rosalie. The top tier was cookies and cream, and the base caramel. Delicious! In the centre of the area we had a table with fruit and savoury food, making sure we had plenty for adults to enjoy. Olaf danced over the table to keep it in theme. To entertain 20 kids of various ages, we borrowed a jumping castle. Best idea ever. The kids had so much fun flitting between the castle, yard toys, craft tables and food that we didn’t need to do any organised games, referee any fights, or soothe any meltdowns. Our Cheesy Elsa had a wonderful party. She was so happy to see her friends and spent most of her party on the jumping castle. Happy birthday darling girl! We’re so happy you enjoyed your birthday and party. Love you to the moon and back.

9 Baby “Lasts” I’ll Miss (And Also Celebrate)

August 24, 2014 / Family, Kids / 0 comment

So much of having a baby is about their firsts. First smile, first laugh, first crawl and first step. What we often forget is that with each “first” comes a “last.” The last time your baby will crawl, the last time they will sleep in their crib, the last time they breastfeed. These lasts are usually unexpected and often not even noticed until they’re long gone. Then, you might mourn these little moments that made your baby a baby. These are the lasts I’ll miss the most:

1. Last night in the crib

Just before age two, my kid catapulted herself out of her crib and sprained her wrist. I had been planning on keeping her in her crib until college (or at least three!) because I knew what would lie ahead—night after night of returning her to her bed and lying next to her until she fell asleep. Easy bedtime and quiet nights to ourselves were truly over.

2. Last time crawling

The turbo-charged crawler starts to pull themselves up, and suddenly you need to take childproofing to the next level in your house. The coffee table, shelves and drawers are all fair game. Soon, say goodbye to storing your breakables on table tops and bureaus, not to mention being able to cook on the stove top without worrying someone will be pulling at the pots and pans. There’s also something insanely cute about a crawling baby with their butt up in the air that I’ll miss seeing zoom around the floor.

3. Last time in the high chair

Our kid is truly done with the high chair—even if I’d prefer she wasn’t! It was so much easier having a kid contained with the tray around her to prevent a mess all over the house. Yes, it’s now easier in terms of seating at restaurants, but our house is a disaster of crumbs and fallen pieces of fruit, bread, cheese and unidentifiable half-masticated objects.

4. Last “mama”

Somehow over the past few weeks “mama” has turned into “mom,” often said like this: “Moooooooom” (and with rolled eyes). And she’s not quite three.

5. Last garbled words

She’s been calling strawberries “bubbies” for about a year, and we now call them the same name. Yesterday, she said “strawberry” for the first time and I almost cried. Does this mean I can’t call them “bubbies” anymore, too?

6. Last time changing a diaper

I won’t lie—I’ve been looking forward to this day for years! Not only is it great not to waste so much money every month on diapers, it’s also a big step for our little one in feeling like she’s finally a big girl.

7. Last time in onesies

Of all the baby outfits out there, onesies were my favorite. They go on and off super easy, have snaps to make diaper changes simple and cover the back to keep it warm, I was devastated when my girl outgrew them. Not only did I have to worry about finding bloomers for under her dresses and skirts (and keeping her back warm in cooler weather), but it was a big sign that my baby was no longer a baby.

8. Last mushing-up of food

There’s nothing fun about making multiple meals for every member in the house every day. Now that our kid eats basically the same food as us, it’s cut down my daily personal chef time by 50%. Hooray for a bit of time back!

9. Last nap

As she grew, my little one’s naps slowly dropped from all day, to three, to two and then one. And now…none. I miss naps like nothing else! Those precious quiet hours during the middle of the day have been replaced with entertaining a toddler who wants to keep on playing while you’d prefer to be eating lunch, watching Netflix or doing laundry.

This article first appeared on MommyNearest.com

The Four Things You Need To Know About Newborns

August 20, 2014 / Kids / 0 comment

The Only Four Things You Need To Know About Newborns via akissgoodnight.co

I’ll never forget those first torturous months of parenthood. Second guessing every decision I made, Googling everything from “swaddle too tight?” to “dropped iphone on babys head”. My complete lack of confidence in my parenting ability made me seek advice from any source possible. I read every book from The Happiest Baby On The Block to The New Basics, and found so many opposing ideas on every part of baby’s life that I was left paralyzed with confusion as what to do with this new, screaming, red-faced creature.

Fast-forward to almost three years later. With a toddler who managed to survive despite my lack of parenting skills, I feel vastly more confident around babies. When friends who are about to have a new baby come to me with questions, my best advice comes down to these four, simple points:

1. You can’t spoil a baby

Does this sound familiar? “Don’t hold the baby all day or it will get used to it and won’t go to sleep by itself”, “Feed the baby every four hours from birth” (ignoring all the wailing in between). Great advice given to new parents by people who don’t have to live with their newborn baby. “You’re spoiling the baby!” My feeling is that life with a newborn is hard enough without trying to persuade him/her that it doesn’t want what it wants. The one thing that made life easier for me was realizing that this tiny new creature had NO IDEA where it was or what it was supposed to be doing in this brand new life. The baby was confused, scared and needed me. So that’s what I did – I gave the baby what it needed to make both our lives as easy and pleasant as possible. I held, fed, and slept on-demand for those first few months while baby was adjusting to life on the outside. There is plenty of time for feeding and sleep schedules in the coming months. How about we all just focus on getting through each day as best we can for those first, hard months?

2. Do what you need to do

Mothers have so much pressure put on them to do what’s right for the baby, even if this is completely opposed to what’s best for the mother. If we all remember that we’re all doing the best we can and stop judging each other, it’s much easier for moms to put their own health and wellbeing as a priority, and do whatever they need to do to survive. This might mean bottle or formula feeding. It might mean taking a break and getting a sitter, or even going somewhere overnight to just get a full nights sleep. Whatever you need to survive, that’s what’s best for your baby.

3. When you’re at breaking point, get help

Those moms who look like they’ve got it all together? Secret: they’re probably putting on a really good front. Being a first-time mom is so hard, even if some women make it look easy. If you’re struggling, miserable, lonely, depressed – get help. It does not mean you’re not a good mother if you need help – it actually makes you a smart mama. If you don’t have friends or family nearby to listen, lend a hand, take the baby, or take you out for wine when you need a break, then hire help if possible. Don’t struggle alone thinking it makes you a failure if you’re not coping. We’ve all been there and felt like we couldn’t make it another hour let alone another day.

4. Enjoy the good parts

I had such a difficult baby that I absolutely HATED it when people told me to “enjoy every moment”, particularly when most of her early moments were pure misery for me. I suggest enjoying the moments that are great, and trying to survive the rest. Do not feel guilty if you don’t enjoy every single moment. Yes your baby will grow super fast, and yes these moments are precious. They can also be super hard, particularly in the beginning, when every day seems to stretch into eternity. And you know, life in general isn’t amazing and enjoyable every second of every day – even for non-parents. So take the pressure off. If you can enjoy and cherish a part of each day, I’d say you’re doing pretty well.

Disclaimer: I am not a baby expert. Not by a long shot. This is just what worked for me. Good luck new mama, I’m rooting for you!

This article first appeared on Mommynearest.com

The Ways Having A Baby Has Changed My Marriage (For Better and Worse)

August 20, 2014 / Family, Kids / 0 comment

Ways My Marriage Changed Post-Baby via akissgoodnight.co

I naively thought that having a baby would be super romantic. That we would catch each other’s eyes over our blissfully sleeping baby’s head and smile lovingly at each other. I thought having a baby would bring my husband and I even closer together, but the reality is so much more complicated than I had imagined it would be. Having a baby certainly changed our marriage, in ways that are both good and bad.

1. We want to spend any free time alone

At the end of the day, pre-baby, I used to look forward to eating dinner together, snuggling on the couch, and curling up to watch a movie. After spending all day and often all night with our baby however, all each of us wants is time to ourselves. My husband loves playing computer games to shoot his stress out, and I love eating chocolate and watching The Bachelor (no judgement, please!).

2. Every parent for themselves

Especially in that first year with our difficult baby, my husband and I were both so exhausted and sleep deprived that we just didn’t care how the other person felt. We were doing everything we could individually to survive, often at the detriment of the other person. “Sure, you are tired, but hey, I’m MORE tired” is how we were feeling. It become a competition as to who was the most tired, the most frustrated, the most in need of a break. Thankfully as our child got older, we started to work together as a team.

3.Emotions are heightened

Pre-baby, it’s much easier to deal with annoyances from your partner. He doesn’t take the garbage out, not a big deal. Your tolerance level for things is generally a lot higher, so there’s less arguing and bickering. Take away your sleep and time to yourself, and suddenly the smallest, most inconsequential things can make you snap. Stupid things cause epic fights, like “you ate the last of the chocolate!”

Ways My Marriage Changed Post-Baby via akissgoodnight.co

4. Time together is scarce

I kind of figured that once Baby came along we would have less time together, but it just didn’t dawn on me until she actually arrived and we brought her home that we would never be able to go out alone again unless we planned in advance and organised it with babysitters. Good bye spontaneity, and also basically the end of dinners out alone. When factoring in the cost of a babysitter to a meal, it suddenly became so expensive to go out for dinner that we would only splurge for birthdays and anniversaries.

5. Your conversations change

Pre-baby, you might have discussed intellectual things like climate change and politics over dinner. Post baby, our conversations are all about poop. Even three years on, it’s still all about poop.

6. He looks at you in an entirely different way

After having a baby, you reach a new level of intimacy with your partner. They’ve seen things they might wish they hadn’t, but have also seen you exposed, vulnerable, and powerful as you give birth to their child. Your relationship can’t ever be the same again as they’ve witnessed your literal transformation into becoming a mother.

Ways My Marriage Changed Post-Baby via akissgoodnight.co

7. You’re tied together forever

Sure, beforehand you said vows to be together forever, but having a baby solidifies that you really will be in each others’ lives forever, no matter what. It’s an added incentive to make your marriage work, and an achievement you’ve accomplished together. Creating a person! The baptism of fire that is childbirth and then raising a child! With this new parenting gig, you really are in this together forever.

8. Priorities change

If I’m really honest, my priorities before baby came along were still pretty focussed on myself. My husband was my priority because being with him made me happy – meaning I was still my own main priority. Having a baby threw both of our priorities out the window. Our child is now our first priority – both of our first priority, which really strengthens our marriage and feeling of being a team.

9. The love you have for each other changes

We might not go out on dates much anymore, or do many “romantic” things (right now, my husband watching the child so I can go to a yoga class is so romantic), but our love for each other is actually stronger than ever before. It’s just different. That giddy feeling has been replaced by a deep respect. I look at my husband and I am blown away by what an amazing father he is. I’m in awe of the love he shows our daughter, the patience and kindness, even when she’s being incredibly difficult. I had no idea before we had a baby that I could love a man even more after seeing how he loved someone else.

Photos by Vincent Lai, Saving Grace Photography, Bridget Eldridge Photography.
This article first appeared on Mommynearest.com

Why I Keep Taking My Child To Restaurants

July 27, 2014 / Family, Kids / 0 comment

Why I Take My Child To Restaurants via akissgoodnight.co

Taking our toddler to a restaurant is hazardous for all parties. It’s always rushed, food ends up on the floor/our laps/the ceiling, and we always end the meal saying to each other, “Let’s never do that again.” And yet, every weekend, without fail, we take our crazy child to a restaurant. In case you’re wondering why, here are the main reasons we persist in torturing ourselves—and fellow diners—by taking our child to dine in public:

1. We love good food

This is the absolute number one reason. My husband and I love to eat out, and the thought of giving this up for a few years is one sacrifice we’re not willing to make. It’s our way of keeping part of our old lives alive while we give up the rest of ourselves to being parents.

2. It’s a social thing

How many social gatherings revolve around food in restaurants? Exactly. Pretty much all of them—unless your entire party is full of tiny children. If you want to socialize with other adults, especially in a city, you do it in a restaurant. Rather than not seeing any of our pre-child friends, we keep going to restaurants, with the child, and hope that the venue they’ve chosen is kid-friendly.

3. Table manners

We hope that by exposing our child to restaurants from a young age that she will eventually pick up social cues on how to eat in public. Things like, how to sit, be patient, order politely and eat around other civilized people (read: eat with cutlery rather than shoving fistfuls of cheerios into her mouth).

4. Exposure to food

I’m an average cook. I actually hate cooking and only do it because we need to eat to survive. Our diets as a result are healthy, but pretty plain and unadventurous. When we eat out, however, my daughter is exposed to cuisines from cultures I’d never attempt to cook, like Japanese or Indian.

Dining Out With Kids via akissgoodnight.co

In case you’re wondering how we make it as stress-free as possible, I’ve added some tips that help us navigate the New York City and Sydney restaurant scene with a less-than-desirable dining companion.

1. Choose your location wisely

I’d never take my child anywhere that isn’t suitable for a little kid. For me, this includes spots that have space between tables so she’s not dining on our neighbors’ laps, somewhere to park the travel stroller and a park nearby for a quick getaway. A restaurant with long wait times is also a big no-no.

2. Order quickly

We order something for the kid as soon as our bottoms hit the chairs, and then food for ourselves shortly after. With a kid who hates to sit for long, you want to make the conditions as favorable as possible for a happy outing.

3. Have an exit strategy

If she’s particularly resistant to sitting that day, one of us will take her outside for a walk until the food arrives, and we ask for the check as soon as the food lands on our table. This way, we’re actually seated for a pretty short amount of time!

4. Be prepared

I bring her current favorite toys (Anna and Elsa with clip on dresses), small snacks and load up the iPhone with games or YouTube playlists. Even though we have a zero Youtube policy these days after seeing our child turn into a zombie watching Playdoh videos, we relax this when a pleasant dining experience is at stake.

5. Tip big!

Even if the meal is a disaster and we leave shame-faced, we always tip big so when the staff sees us again, they hopefully remember the tip and not the tantrum.

This article was first published on Mommynearest.com.

The Edge of Three

July 9, 2014 / Family, Kids / 10 Comments

Age two started out sweet. Big smiles, mispronounced first words and learning to run. But somewhere over the past ten months, sweet two turned into challenging-almost-three. It’s truly an age of split personalities—easy going, joyful and happy one minute, then devastated, howling, and limp noodle on the floor the next. This age is hair-pullingly frustrating, and heart-meltingly beautiful, all bundled together. Here are some of the highlights and lowlights of this challenging age:

Meltdowns over nothing
You didn’t cut the crusts off the sandwich—cue meltdown. You DO cut the crusts off—cue another meltdown. The thrashing tantrums come hard and fast with no warning.

Toilet training
This isn’t fun, and it takes a lot longer than three days for most children. It’s frustrating and hard for the whole family, and something best avoided until you feel it’s absolutely time to be done with diapers.

Food wars
Suddenly your “I’ll eat anything” kid, who shoveled down broccoli, green beans and begged for carrots, will now only gingerly pick at a piece of plain herb or vegetable—after carefully removing any sign of offending sauce. Your toddler is surviving on air and crackers.

“I’m a big girl”
Or boy, of course. Your toddler now wants to do EVERYTHING by themselves, and will actually repeat actions like walking down stairs or climbing up on a chair if they’re assisted or carried the first time. Frustratingly. the “I’m a big (girl/boy)” often occurs mid-meltdown, when said toddler is in a puddle on the floor and refusing to walk/put their pants on/have their hair brushed/go to the potty.

The bedtime routine
At some stage, your toddler will climb or fall out of their crib and need a toddler bed. At this point, your evenings as you know them will be over, and you’ll need to retrain the kid to stay in their room. Yes, easier said than done. Prepare for several nights (dare we say it, even weeks?) of a certain little person discovering they can actually leave their room during the night to come and disturb your precious Scandal watching time—or, God forbid, wake you during the night seeking milk, water or a hug.

Big words
Basic words and short sentences turn into complicated words and phrases almost overnight: “I hear my echo!,” “We’re sharing, mommy!,” “Daddy said I could watch the iPad!.” Your baby has turned into a big kid—which means it’s officially tIme to start spelling out F.R.O.Z.E.N. unless you want to be watching it on repeat from dawn till dusk.

Song and dance
Little kid breaks into “A Whole New World” from Aladdin, with all the words absolutely perfect. (Wait, when did they even see Aladdin?, you might ask yourself!) This is the age of making up songs (“I have a little dog, I have a little dog!”) and dancing with joy on the sidewalk when a car drives past with “Happy” pumping out the windows.

Frozen
The Disney movie is so crazy popular with toddlers, it deserves it’s own section. One of the most entertaining ways to start the day is when you hear the knock, knock, knock on the bathroom door while you’re trying to shower—followed by “Do you want to build a snowman?”.

Being schooled on technology
Your toddler probably is now able to use the iPad better than you can. So next time you can’t figure out how to play a game or watch a video or turn it on, just ask your child …

Hugs and kisses
Right after those meltdowns come the hugs so vigorous they almost take your head off. “I love you Mommy, you’re my best friend!” is exclaimed as frequently as the wet noodle maneuver occurs, and is literally the best thing about having a toddler. That, and the exuberant kisses that cover your face from morning to night. More of this unexpected affection, please!

This article was first published on Mommynearest.com

New Year’s Resolutions: Three Months In

April 15, 2014 / Family, Kids, New York Life / 0 comment

New Year's Resolutions: Three Months In

A good friend asked me to post about how I was going with my New Year’s Resolutions a few months in. I’d like to say that it’s a roaring success and life is now perfect, but that would just be lie now, wouldn’t it?

All I can say is that I’m doing the best I can do, every day. Some days go better than others. Some days are wonderful and I feel great about myself at the end. Some are a complete disaster and I wish I could have a do-over.

The main thing is I’m really trying to be a better person. And there’s been progress!

The most obvious is how my relationship with little E has improved. I’ve been making a huge effort to be present for her during our time together, and she’s turned into a huge mummy’s girl. So many hugs and kisses, saying “you’re my best friend Mummy!” and insanely cute things like this that help me want to do even better.

A Day In The Life Of A Sleep-Despising Toddler

April 1, 2014 / Kids / 2 Comments

A Day In The Life Of A Sleep Despising Toddler via akissgoodnight.co

We had a rocky start to sleep with our newborn, thanks to silent reflux, which plagued our family’s first year together. At 10 months we sleep trained, desperate to stop getting up three times a night with the baby. And for a few, sweet months, we had our first full nights of sleep in almost a year. Sadly, however, it didn’t last. Teeth came in. Sickness took over. Our toddler learned to climb out of her crib, and then developed a fear of the door being closed.

And so, here we are, with a 2.5 year old toddler who still wakes up several times a night. To say we are sleep deprived is an understatement. I’d use words like “zombie” and “brain dead”.

Most people we know have babies and kids who sleep in their beds for the whole night, maybe occasionally waking up here and there. I just don’t understand how we ended up with a child who just despises sleep so much (sleep is so wonderful! why don’t she do more of it?!).

So here is a day in our lives, with the worst sleeping kid of all time.

6:30am: E wakes up, still tired but chirping “it’s not night any more!”. If I don’t hear her calling she will walk into the bedroom, grab my face in her hands and yell “mummy wake up!”.

6:45am – 8am: Drink copious amounts of caffeine to wake up while sticking the child in front of the iPad and a huge bowl of Cheerios and milk. I take morning duty so my husband can get a few hours sleep after being up all night with her.

8am – 12pm: Run errands or work while Eloise is at school two days a week. The days she is at school I really want to nap and have to force myself to write the articles I’ve been assigned.

12pm – 2pm: Nap time. I know this, but apparently my toddler does not agree. I either lie down next to her on the floor and beg her to sleep until one of us gives up, or put her in the stroller and walk around the neighborhood for two hours while she naps.

2pm – 7:30pm: Afternoon fun. Playdates, followed by dinner, bath and an attempt to put the child to bed.

8:30pm: It’s clear that the child is still awake, either singing in her bed (preferable), or coming out to the living room to request “more milk” even though her milk bottle is full.

9pm-9:30pm. The visits and talking finally stop and she’s drifted off into peaceful slumber.

10:30pm-12am: She wakes up at least once – I prefer it when I’m awake as it’s hard to go back to sleep when I’ve just fallen into a coma. Either my husband or I cajole/beg/threaten her until she goes back to sleep, which might take anywhere from 10 minutes to two hours.

12am – 6:30am: My husband is on night waking duty. On an average night, she will wake up hopefully only one more time. Several nights a week she will be up at least two more times and takes forever to go back to sleep again. My husband is destroyed. I wake every time he does but thankfully get to stay in bed and go back to sleep.

6:30am: Aaaaaaand she’s up! And it all starts all over again.

Friends with kids who also hate to sleep – it does get better, right? Surely there will come the day where I have to force her to get out of bed? I’m picturing immense payback in her teens – cheerily waking her every morning at 5am, and then dropping her off at school in my pjs with bed hair.

Happy New Year: A New Kind Of Resolution

December 31, 2013 / Family, Kids / 4 Comments

My usual New Year’s resolutions are typically the same every year. Eat less sugar. Exercise more. Do a course to improve my mind. Find a better job. I always forget about them after I write them down, probably because they’re all things that I don’t have to really work on – they’re the things that you either DO or you DON’T DO, they’re not things that require a change from within.

This year I’m trying something new – a new kind of resolution. What I want to change the most is myself, in these simple yet hard ways. I’m often just so tired, so worn out that I catch myself saying and doing things that I regret later on. Snapping at Alec. Being impatient with Missy E. The look on her face when she tries to get my attention as I’m frantically trying to check my email on my phone and she wants me to play with her … I always resolve to try better, to do better. And so here I am, really hoping to spend 2014 becoming a better person in these few, but important ways.

Let Go: NYE Resolutions via akissgoodnight.co

Let go
I’m a grudge holder from way back. I was teased and bullied a lot when I was younger, and it’s made me someone who gets their back up easily and finds it very difficult to forgive people any perceived wrong doings. It’s basically self-defence mechanism that is unconsciously in place to protect myself from getting hurt again. Holding on to anger though is like swallowing poison – it only hurts yourself, and it kills you slowly from the inside out.

Be Brave: NYE Resolutions via akissgoodnight.co

Be brave
I hate confrontations. So much. I hate saying things to people I care about that might upset them, so I’m not completely honest with the people I care about. I keep things inside and let them fester, because I’m too scared to say them to people’s faces incase they react badly and get mad at me. This is another form of poison that I need to try and stop by being braver, and trusting that the people I care about will value me enough to listen to what I have to say.

Slow Down: NYE Resolutions via akissgoodnight.co

Slow down
I’m always rush rush rushing everyone, particularly my spirited toddler, who finds the magic in every stoop in Brooklyn. I’m impatient at the best of times. I need some serious calm breathing and relaxing, and to remind myself not to rush this inquisitive little person who sees the details in the world, and its beauty, in a way that I no longer do. I need to spend more time seeing the world as she sees it – maybe it will become a more magical place for us both.

Be Present - NYE Resolutions via akissgoodnight.co

Be present
“Put down the phone mummy!”. It kills me when she says this. I want her not to have to say this to me anymore.

Be Kind: NYE Resolutions via akissgoodnight.co

Be kind
Harsh words slip out of my mouth, particularly when I’m tired. It doesn’t make them less hurtful, or harmful to relationships with my friends and family. Why can’t I just swallow these hurtful words down and say something more constructive instead? I have so much love for my family and friends. I just never tell them in words. 2014 will be the year of speaking with love.

Happy New Year’s to everyone out there! Thank you for reading my little blog. I wish you and your family a wonderful, kind, 2014.

Images thanks to Bridget Eldrige Photography