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Happy Birthday To Me! A kid-free weekend in the Hunter Valley

August 11, 2014 / Australia, Family, Hunter Valley, Sydney Life, Travel / 2 Comments

This year, there was only one thing I wanted for my birthday – a break. Mum and Dad very kindly agreed to watch Cheese for the weekend so Alec and I could have a few nights to relax. Our first kid-free weekend in three years!

We drove up to the Hunter Valley for the getaway. I booked us a room at the Spicers Vineyard Estate – a beautiful little retreat in Pokolbin. Our room was large, with a fireplace and spa. Our package included two breakfasts and a dinner in their restaurant, Botanica, and complimentary minibar.

The property is set in 25 acres of vineyard and bush, and we took a leisurely stroll around the boundary each evening at dusk. Which, by the way, is the perfect time to see the wild kangaroo families as they come out.

During our stay in the Hunter we dropped by the Pokolbin Chocolate And Jam Company, the Smelly Cheese Shop, two of the Hunter Valley Chocolate Company locations and two wineries: Tempus Two and Audrey Wilkinson.

I adore moscato, and chose these wineries based on their production of the sweet wine of my choice. The Audrey Wilkinson cellar door is a bit off the main track, but worth the extra drive. St up high on a hill, the view out over the wine country is spectacular.

Hunter Valley Muse Restaurant via akissgoodnight.co — Muse Restaurant

Since we were child-free, we indulged in a LOT of food, including two dinners out: Muse Restaurant on my birthday, and Restaurant Botanica the following night. Muse was the perfect restaurant for a fancy, special night out. It was like a fine dining establishment in the city. Delicious creative dishes (I had a kale risotto with winter vegetables), with a friendly, relaxed vibe.

Restaurant Botanica was more relaxed, and perfect for a Sunday night dinner. The food was simpler and perfectly prepared. After the previous day of rich, complicated food, the elegant and slightly more traditional fare at Botanica was exactly what our stomaches craved. Dessert was donuts and cinnamon ice cream. Absolutely a treat.

The last mention on our food extravaganza is Sabor In The Hunter, a dessert bar that popped up while we were away. For lunch (!) one day, Alec and I indulged in the Medley Tasting Plate, which included Opera slice, Mini Lemon Curd meringue in a sweet pastry, Strawberry mousse & mixed berry compote topped with Strawberry, Mini Gianduja layers and a caramelised nut triangle tart. Indulgence complete.

The really great thing about the weekend was being able to spend time with Alec and just take a breath. We talked more than we’ve talked in years, and had energy to focus on each other for the first time in what felt like forever.

Spicers Hunter Valley via akissgoodnight.co — In-room breakfast at Spicers

The three days/two nights was the longest I’ve spent away from Cheese so far. We called in regularly and spoke with her and my mum – she was absolutely happy and chirpy the whole time, running my parents off their feet while charming them simultaneously. When we arrived back home I felt like I had more energy to spend on her than I usually would, the break away really refreshing me.

So it was pretty much a perfect birthday.

What I Love, What I Miss: Adjusting To Life Back In Sydney

August 5, 2014 / Family, Sydney Life / 2 Comments

So we’ve been back in Sydney for about two months and are still struggling to find somewhere to live. Ugh. I forgot how long it takes to settle back after such a huge move. I’ve been enjoying a lot of little things that I’d either totally forgotten about, or never discovered before I left.

Gelato Messina
The best gelato I’ve ever tasted. I’ve eaten is almost every single day since being back. I’d eat it every day if their locations weren’t so far away. Bounty, choc chip and berry yoghurt are rocking my world.

Beaches
I wasn’t a beach person before I left Sydney. I have really fair skin and so have been a “sit in the shade” rather than “sit on the beach” type. Now I have a kid who is mad about playing in the sand, I have a new found love of beaches. Insanely gorgeous, plus hours of free entertainment. Just add sunscreen.

Mersey Valley Cheese
This has always been our favourite cheese. Being in the US however and surrounded by supremely average supermarket cheese, I have a new appreciation for just how awesome this cheese is. Crumbly and sharp – it’s hard not to polish off the whole block in one sitting.

Moscato
I love love sweet wine. Moscato has always been my wine of choice. I did find it in the US, but it wasn’t as common as here, and there wasn’t as much variety. Moscato here is amazingly good and also reasonably priced.

Thai food
I didn’t eat much Thai when I was in the US as whenever I did, it was pretty bad. The Thai in Sydney is so good – I think it’s the closer proximity to Asia, plus the large Thai population living here that contributes so the great food. Whatever the reason, I’m devouring curry puffs and pad see ew like they’re calorie-free.

Supermarket chocolate
Cadbury is awesome. There’s a giant bar of Snack and a packet of Carmel Crowns sitting in the fridge right now.

The sunshine
The weather here is just insane. I arrived back in time for winter (yay!) and it’s been warmer almost every day than it was for the entire of NYC spring.

Target
Target in Sydney is awesome! Super clean, big variety of quality products. Very different to the Brooklyn Target that I used to visit occasionally.

I’m also missing little things about NYC that I also didn’t even think about. The big things I miss are obvious, but the little things caught me by surprise.

Iced tea
Sydney doesn’t do iced tea. I’m so desperate for my daily fix that I’m steeping big jugs of black tea and chilling them every few days.

Bagels
How did I ever live without bagels pre-New York? It’s a mystery.

The subway
After the super fast and frequent NYC subway, my hatred of Sydney’s trains has only intensified. I don’t know what’s worse some days, the crazy traffic when I take to the roads, or the slow moving infrequent trains.

Amazon
Now I’m without my Amazon Prime free two-day shipping, I actually have to get in the car and drive to a shop to buy everything. Even stupid cables and boxes of nappies. I also miss Fresh Direct, Diapers.com and basically every other website that sent me the products I wanted with free shipping.

Cheaper prices
Ahhh the great Aussie price gouge. Buzzfeed has a really funny article about the great Aussie rip off. Paying more for things I only recently bought at a significant price difference is hard to take.

Ben & Jerry’s
While not my favourite brand of ice cream, B&J’s was my face supermarket brand. Now if I want a tub of Karamel Sutra I have to shell out $11 for the privilege.

Ample Hills
My favourite ice cream of all time. Australia doesn’t really do ice cream. It’s does phenomenal gelato and sorbet, but not ice cream. I am dying for one more scoop of Ooey Goey Buttercake and Sweet As Honey. Yuuuum.

Levain Bakery cookies
The best cookies I’ve ever eaten. So big and fat they were almost rock cakes. Big chunks of chocolate that melted in your mouth. Yes we have cookies here, but not like that!

The fast pace
I actually love the frenetic business that is the city. I thrive on over stimulation and love having a lot of colour, buildings and interesting people all around me. Back in Sydney I’m finding it hard to adjust to the slower pace and having personal space again.

Doormen
I had never had a doorman before my NYC apartment. Not only do I miss the community of my building, but I also miss the big-hearted doormen who became friends after seeing so much of them day in and out.

I write, therefore I am

June 17, 2014 / Writing / 3 Comments

Why do I write? The question actually is, why can’t I STOP writing? Since I was a small child, I’ve been obsessed with writing down my thoughts, daily events (today we got a new dog!) and feelings. I’ve dabbled in (bad) poetry, quickly abandoned diaries and short stories. Blogging was the natural progression of my obsession with words.

I’ve often wondered why an introvert like myself likes putting her most personal feelings out there on the internet for everyone to see, when I have trouble talking about the same things in person with close friends. I can only describe writing as a cathartic process, something that makes me feel like once I have put these feelings on paper (or blog) that they can be washed away and the next day can start afresh.

I’m obsessed with recording life. Photographs litter my drawers, thousands of images clog my hard drive. Boxes of diaries with only a few entries are stacked in my wardrobe. Blogging is such an easy way to capture memories as well as feelings, and to put them somewhere that they can’t be lost.

I’ve always found it easier to express myself in writing than through speaking. A sensitive, anxious child grew into a guarded adult who prefers speaking to the void of the internet than looking into the empathetic eyes of friends when talking about things that are hard. Typing the words is somehow easier than saying them. Writing enables me to distance myself from emotions and articulate myself in a way I’m unable to otherwise do so.

Writing for me is like breathing. I write every day, even if it’s just an epic email to a friend. It’s no surprise that I prefer texting to voice calls, and emails to Skype. The written word is essential.

Goodbye to all that

June 1, 2014 / Cheese, Family, New York Life / 2 Comments

Three years ago, I flew to New York alone, and four months pregnant. Meeting Alec at the airport I was apprehensive, scared, extremely nauseous, and not sure that we’d made the right decision. The years that followed were the hardest, most challenging, most frustrating years of my life thus far – compounded a million by having a baby in a country far from our family.

But in the middle of these difficult years, something extraordinary happened. We created a tiny New Yorker and made a home in this big crazy city. We explored. We dreamed big. We discovered what we were truly capable of when faced with adversity. New York is a hard place to live. It’s fast, it’s dirty, it’s expensive. It’s also aggressive, strong and fierce. Each day can be like a battlefield – just taking a subway ride solo with a small child requires serious commitment and resolve.

I learned a lot about myself thanks to this tough city. That I, too, can be tough, resilient and resourceful. That I’m capable of starting over in a new country, of making so many wonderful friends.

Living in this city plus motherhood broke me down, and built me back up again into a person who is more confident, more certain of her own worth, and who is happier with who she is than ever before. Thank you New York for toughening up this soft girl from Sydney suburbia.

Saying goodbye is something I don’t want to be doing. It feels too soon, too unfinished. But things don’t always go to plan, and our priorities have changed. Alec, Cheese and I will be returning for a time to Sydney to be closer to our families. We feel that it’s the right thing for us to do at this time in all of our lives, and we are embracing this decision while walking away from a life we also love passionately. Something I’m finding really hard to do. We are beyond lucky that we have such a wonderful life to return to back in Australia. Family and friends whom we love, and a country where it’s truly great to live.

So goodbye (for now) to the piles of garbage on the sidewalk. To the smell of dog pee and sticky pavements in summer. To rats, lunatics and rappers in the subway, polar vortexes and hurricanes. So long to loving friends who embraced us into their lives. To Cheese’s playmates since birth. To tulips and daffodils in the spring, and fields of orange and red leaves in the fall. To carousels and whoopie pies, Broadway and world-class ballet. Goodbye to a life we loved, and hello to a brand new chapter for us all.

New York, we love you, and we will see you again soon.

The Expat Life: Where Your Heart Is Always Torn In Two

January 12, 2014 / Cheese, Family, New York Life / 2 Comments

The Expat Life: Where Your Heart Is Torn In Two - akissgoodnight.co

We’ve been living in New York for almost exactly three years now. Three of the toughest, most exciting, frustrating years of my life (having a tough kid doesn’t make it any easier).

As I near my 3 year anniversary of living the expat life, I’ve been reflecting a lot on how living in this situation, for me, is like living with your heart permanently torn in two. It’s a state of constantly missing those you left behind and who are living their lives without you, and, at the same time, enjoying your new life – with the thought always floating in your head, how long will this last? How long until the good doesn’t outweigh the bad? How long until you make the move back home and settle back into your old life? Sooner? Later? Never?

Living in a constant state of flux
At least, I certainly am. When we moved here, our time estimation for how long we’d live here was one-to-two years. Every year, we say we will give it one more year. Most of our stuff is in storage in Australia, but since we can’t decide whether or not to commit to living here permanently, we don’t know what to do with it all. It’s things like a giant couch that wouldn’t fit into any NYC apartment. My photographs and negatives and books. All my memories and possessions for my life pre 2011 are packaged into small boxes and stuffed into my parent’s house. I find myself missing things. Like a hair clip I was given for my 21st birthday that I still love to wear, but didn’t make the cut for things that we needed to bring over. And having to re-buy everything (PAINFUL!) because it’s cheaper than having the old things shipped over. How long until we can commit to a life here or there? Is there a magic number of years that pass and present the answer?

It starts off really really hard, but gets easier
The first year was so tough that I didn’t think we’d make it through and wanted to fly home almost every day. I missed everything about my old life – our home, our family and friends, the warm weather, and the easiness of life when you know how everything runs and how to do everything without thinking about it. The hardest parts about adapting to life in the US were the little things. Where to buy good Greek yoghurt. Finding a new GP, dentist, seamstress, housekeeper … Working out how medical insurance worked (ok, and some not so little things).

After the two-year mark things went from tough and frustrating to finally comfortable enough to feel like I didn’t have to fight to get little things done every single day. As I near the three-year mark, life has become great. It’s no longer a daily frustration as I can’t work out the little nuances that make life here different. Some still remain (why is supermarket bread SO BAD?! Why is the cheese ORANGE?! Why does tomato ketchup have CORN SYRUP in it?!) but, in general, New York is feeling like home.

Starting your tribe from scratch
It takes a while to make a new tribe. In my case, it took over two years to accumulate a new circle of friends whom I felt comfortable with. Feeling lonely and disconnected, while seeing all my old friends having a blast together was tough. It takes a lot of effort to stay in touch with people, especially as we get older and have more time commitments. One thing that can be said is that moving countries really shows you who your friends are! The ones who reply to your emails with thoughtful messages (and send you notes spontaneously when they’re thinking of you!) are going to be a lot fewer than you think (sadness), but they will be the ones who are your friends for life (happiness).

Missing family
Family is tough no matter where you live. Near them, they can drive you so nuts you wish you lived far, far away, and then if you DO live far, far away, you miss them like crazy and wonder if you made a mistake. Add a small child into that and it’s an even more difficult situation. People talk a lot about “mother guilt” – feeling guilty about everything you do and don’t do for your child. Instead of this, I get “daughter guilt”, where I feel guilty for moving so far away from my parents with their only grand child. We Skype every week and it’s a constant reminder of how much our decision to live this life is causing pain to other people who are missing out on precious moments with their grand child.

The up side
These last three years in New York have been a wonderful experience, despite the hardships – or perhaps, even, in some ways, because of them. Without a doubt, it’s been totally worth it. I’m an introverted person, so being here has pushed me out of my comfort zone in ways that staying in Sydney wouldn’t have. As well as the amazing experiences I’ve had here (not to mention that NEW YORK IS MY HOME!! How cool is that?!), the self-reliance and resilience I’ve built up as a result of this new life have also been positive for my own personal growth.

It’s not just my life
It’s not just about me and Alec. We are constantly trying to decide what is best for E. Little Missy E is having an amazing childhood, by the way. Central Park is her backyard. The American Museum of Natural History is her playground. She has dined at some of the best restaurants in NYC, all before she could walk. Lucky kid. We try to keep her as connected as possible with family back home so she knows who she is and where she comes from. It’s a normal part of her week to Skype Nanna and Pop-pop. E gets older, she will truly reap the benefits of her dual life. As an American and Australian citizen, a world of opportunities are literally open to her.

Happy New Year: A New Kind Of Resolution

December 31, 2013 / Family, Kids / 4 Comments

My usual New Year’s resolutions are typically the same every year. Eat less sugar. Exercise more. Do a course to improve my mind. Find a better job. I always forget about them after I write them down, probably because they’re all things that I don’t have to really work on – they’re the things that you either DO or you DON’T DO, they’re not things that require a change from within.

This year I’m trying something new – a new kind of resolution. What I want to change the most is myself, in these simple yet hard ways. I’m often just so tired, so worn out that I catch myself saying and doing things that I regret later on. Snapping at Alec. Being impatient with Missy E. The look on her face when she tries to get my attention as I’m frantically trying to check my email on my phone and she wants me to play with her … I always resolve to try better, to do better. And so here I am, really hoping to spend 2014 becoming a better person in these few, but important ways.

Let Go: NYE Resolutions via akissgoodnight.co

Let go
I’m a grudge holder from way back. I was teased and bullied a lot when I was younger, and it’s made me someone who gets their back up easily and finds it very difficult to forgive people any perceived wrong doings. It’s basically self-defence mechanism that is unconsciously in place to protect myself from getting hurt again. Holding on to anger though is like swallowing poison – it only hurts yourself, and it kills you slowly from the inside out.

Be Brave: NYE Resolutions via akissgoodnight.co

Be brave
I hate confrontations. So much. I hate saying things to people I care about that might upset them, so I’m not completely honest with the people I care about. I keep things inside and let them fester, because I’m too scared to say them to people’s faces incase they react badly and get mad at me. This is another form of poison that I need to try and stop by being braver, and trusting that the people I care about will value me enough to listen to what I have to say.

Slow Down: NYE Resolutions via akissgoodnight.co

Slow down
I’m always rush rush rushing everyone, particularly my spirited toddler, who finds the magic in every stoop in Brooklyn. I’m impatient at the best of times. I need some serious calm breathing and relaxing, and to remind myself not to rush this inquisitive little person who sees the details in the world, and its beauty, in a way that I no longer do. I need to spend more time seeing the world as she sees it – maybe it will become a more magical place for us both.

Be Present - NYE Resolutions via akissgoodnight.co

Be present
“Put down the phone mummy!”. It kills me when she says this. I want her not to have to say this to me anymore.

Be Kind: NYE Resolutions via akissgoodnight.co

Be kind
Harsh words slip out of my mouth, particularly when I’m tired. It doesn’t make them less hurtful, or harmful to relationships with my friends and family. Why can’t I just swallow these hurtful words down and say something more constructive instead? I have so much love for my family and friends. I just never tell them in words. 2014 will be the year of speaking with love.

Happy New Year’s to everyone out there! Thank you for reading my little blog. I wish you and your family a wonderful, kind, 2014.

Images thanks to Bridget Eldrige Photography

A Day Alone With My 2-Year-Old

December 21, 2013 / Cheese, Family, Kids / 2 Comments

I’ve really enjoyed my toddler being at her 2s programs since September. Four days a week, she goes to one of two schools, where she is in either a 2 or 3 hour drop-off program. Add in the 2 hour nap, and I get several solid hours of time to myself four days a week to work on freelance assignments and my websites. Yesterday, however, was a reminder of life without school – and it was scary.

Now that school is closed for two weeks (TWO WEEKS!!!) and my babysitter is on holiday (an actual holiday, minus children – jealous), it’s just all me, all day. We usually have every Friday completely together, so I didn’t think much of our “holiday” time until yesterday happened.

6:30am: She wakes up. I go to get her out of her room only to be told “No Mummy, want DADDY” and have the door slammed in my face.
6:45: She stops whining for Daddy and comes out into the living room, where I am already on my 2nd glass of Coke Zero. We play with the iPad, Playdoh, tiaras and stuffed animals until my husband wakes up.
9:15: My husband gets up. He needed extra sleep after getting up with Cheese during the night. I steal a quick shower while he tries to convince our toddler to eat some form of breakfast that doesn’t come in a pouch, and then heads off to work.
9:45: Cheese realises Daddy isn’t coming back. Everything goes downhill and no amount of Play Doh will fix it.
11am: I try and put her down for a nap. She’s so exhausted she’s almost rubbing the eyes out of her head. She insists “No nap!” even as her eyes are rolling back.
11:10: 10 minutes of screaming for milk and “bubbies” (strawberries). I comply with both.
11:30pm: Loud banging from her room tells me she is still awake and possibly abseiling from the ceiling.
11:33: “BOO BOO KITTY!” and more crying (she wants a hello Kitty bandaid for her abseiling injury).
12:15: The muttering and crying stops and I think she’s gone to sleep.
12:17: The voice at the door “MUMMYYYYY where aaaaare you?!”. Argh. I go in and notice she has pooed. Change diaper and put her back down to even more protesting and whining.
12:50: She has now been screaming for 20 minutes. I can’t find the noise cancelling headphones and am going out of my mind. I offer milk and try and put her back to bed.
1pm: I give up and let her out of her room. I make her a grilled cheese sandwich that she won’t touch. She eats an entire punnet of strawberries and demands chocolate milk. Nice try.
3pm: We play with all her toys while I beg her to eat something with protein or even carbs in it. Building block houses for her princesses, Play Doh again with the talking Elmo Shape & Spin that I always tread on during the night, and sing Twinkle Twinkle and Wheels on the Bus along with the iPad.
4pm: It’s time to leave the house. We are meant to be going to a Christmas party in Williamsburg but I’m too exhausted to take her on the subway. Instead we stroll towards Kids Club for an open play session. We don’t reach the end of the block before she falls asleep in the stroller. Of course. I now have about an hour of walking the streets to do to give her the nap she needs.
4:45: I find myself in Red Hook. I have walked a long way.
5pm: I walk to the new Whole Foods in Gowanus and relish shopping without someone whining and grabbing everything in her reach. I slowly browse shelves, checking out brands I usually whizz past. I find a gingerbread house already baked and assembled, ready for decorating – the day is looking up!
5:45pm: She wakes up when I’m at the cash register – somewhat surprised to find herself in Whole Foods. We stroll home.
6pm: We stop outside a church to listen to the bells. Cheese asks for “more bells!” very insistently. Sadly I can’t deliver on more bells, so we head home.
6:15pm: Home, and I’m so tired I can barely stand. I throw pasta leftovers in the microwave and serve them to Cheese for dinner, along with her beloved “bubbies”. She won’t touch a thing and demands to watch BOTH the iPad AND the TV at once. I’m too tired to put up a fight, so put Barney on the TV and her favourite video, Feist’s “1234”, on the iPad. I collapse on the couch next to her high chair and beg her to eat.
7pm: My husband gets home. I nearly cry with relief.

Only two weeks left until school starts again. Not that I’m counting down or anything.

My Secret Indulgence

December 31, 2007 / Family / 0 comment

I’ve been sick for the entire of December. I’ve had sinus, throat and chest infections and three lots of antibiotics, and I am still sick. To make myself feel better, I had a pedicure today. I get it done every month or so, and even though I know it is such an indulgence, it makes me feel so good that I can’t stop going!

I usually get my nails done in a deep red, but I chose pink today. It looked a lot darker in the bottle, but came out really candy – which is perfect for a cheery start to what I hope to be an amazing 2008.